Archives for the month of: June, 2012

Apparently, my fertility needs to be restored.

I ordered the Restoring Fertility Yoga DVD from a clinic on the other side of the country, and within 2 days, there it was in my mailbox. Exciting! I’ve been really keen to start this series, which is divided among the 4 phases of a woman’s cycle: menstrual, follicular, ovulatory, and luteal.

I tried it out today, and was pleased that I could do all the poses and that I also got a little sweaty. There was nothing super intense in it, but I’m like the least flexible person in the world, so I’ve always found yoga intimidating. I don’t like things I’m not really good at.

I’m at cycle day 11 today, and had a cycle monitoring appointment this morning. I’ve got a whack of follicles growing in the ol’ ovaries currently, and I’m happy to report righty seems to be joining this party this month. Righty seems pretty lazy, and often leaves all the work for lefty. I’ve currently got at least 3 that seem to be growing at a good pace, so we’ll see if that continues when I return on Tuesday morning.

My surgery date has been set for July 10th–our wedding anniversary and 2 days after my birthday. I better get some good presents this year.

Nothing else to report, except that my current lulu uniform has changed seasons. Here‘s what I can’t take off (also, the Rehearsal T, which is pretty much the only thing getting me out of bed these days).

-Budding Yogi Regular Van

Cycle Monitoring – Cycle Day 4 – Duration: less than half an hour (what?!?!)

I started all over today with a fresh round of cycle monitoring. Things were speedy. So speedy, in fact, that I didn’t even have a chance to drink my coffee OR eat my oatmeal (thank you, Starbucks).

My doctor spent more time with me than usual, clearly not thrilled to see me back and unpregnant. The feeling is mutual, pal. Believe you me.

We discussed what happens now. He asked me a question he’s never asked me before: “What were you hoping for from this appointment?”. Basically, where are we going from here, was the question put to me. I guess now that I’ve failed so many times at the IUI game, more options are open to me. He brought up IVF for the first time as an available option, and talked again about the laparoscopy. I could go ahead with IVF even without the surgery, he told me. The ball is entirely in my court, it seems. He talked about injectables again, which I turned down for this month, as it’s the last month of school and I guess injectables involve a lot more appointments. He was fine with that, and bumped up my Femara intake for this cycle from 2 pills to 3. I didn’t get the sense from him that he was overly confident about this month, but never mind.

So my plan is to go ahead with the laparoscopy before we hop aboard the IVF train, in the hopes that we figure out why the hell I can’t get pregnant. I have a sneaking suspicion there is some endometriosis going on in my business, and my hope is that the surgery will be able to clear up some issues. Crazy, I know, but maybe we could even manage to have a baby naturally. My gut is telling me there’s a reason I haven’t gotten pregnant yet, and if we do the IVF now, we’re unnaturally forcing something that isn’t supposed to happen yet (if that makes any sense). I feel like the surgery is going to give us some answers to my effed up lady parts. I could be wrong, but this is what my gut says.

I’ve been really sad this past week. There have been a lot of tears and a lot of hopeless feelings and thoughts. I don’t really know why this week has been so hard, but I can feel myself falling into a nasty funk that will only be exacerbated by the copious amounts of free time I’ll have over the summer. I’m not complaining about having the summers off (I swear–I SWEAR!!!), but it’s hard to go from days that are so structured (every minute of every day), to no structure at all. That’s a dangerous recipe for an infertile with an internet connection.

Anyway, that’s what’s happening in these parts right now. My mum was worried about me, so she picked me up and brought me home. I’m kind of worried about me, too.

-Sad sad sad Regular Van.